The Suite Love
by OncestQueen
Summary: Dirk and Jake get it on in Dirk's new apartment in NYC.


it was a sticky summr night. dwayne the rock johnson was sitting in his suite watching fast and frurious 45. he was so hot. ther was sweat dripping down from his sweat pore glands onto his yoked body. he took a drink of an illegal substane, alchohole, it tasted so godo after a hard days work while fiming fast and fruius 78. dwayne the rock johnson loves to go fast espsecially with bruce williace. hes homo for bruce willace. dwayne has moved to this suite a few yrs ago after the first world war. these r hard times ok stop hating on the rock. suddnely, dwayne heard a knock on his front door.

"who tha t" dwayne squeakes?

"it is i, the police, open up or your hands wil be up" police officer said.

"ok no homo officer" dwayne has no homo i swear

dwayne walked up to his door but then he remembered he has no clothes on so he grabs a dorito and covers his willy with dorito.

"helo officer no homo pls it is i dwayne the rock johnson."

"helo mr johnson" the creature shrilled "may i come into ur apartment pls im not done"

dwayne stepped aside. he was confused. what did he do wrong why is this police officr in his sweet suite?

"officr waht is the problem i did nothin wrong im new to this place pls cut me some slack im vry famous." dwayne muttered

"dayne my man i've got a plan," officr said,"im going to sit down so please take a seat n stay neat"

"ok officr." dwayne walked ovr to where the officr was sitting and hid the bear he was drinking bc he knew that was probs why officer was here. "what is it?"

Dwayne noticed the officers big beady eyes staring at his sweaty pecks, they were so hot n he wanted a piece of that hunk. the officr scooted closr to dwayne.

"you are mine now dwayne, i wil cause u no pain" the officer said, "i am little king john, and ur suite is located right in my sweet kingdom so u bettr not pawn"

suddenly little king john got ontop of dwayne and pressed his wet lips onto dwayne's thick neck. dwayne monas because god danm that felt so good. dwayne noticed that little king john was now moving northward towards his willy wonka, little king john at the delicous dorito. it was so crunchy and cheesy he loves doritots. dwaynes pupils dialated. he didnt care about the fact this was complete stranger, this stranger was hot n knew how to jiggy with it. little king john put dwaynes whole willy into his pie hole. dwayne could feel little king johns tongue slide across his grandpa george. dwayne pushed little king john away.

"wtf who evn r u" he panted "y r u suking my cok w/o my consent this is totes uncalled 4 idc who u r this is wrong!" dwayne actually did care. he watched yellow dino and he knew that he had to take three steps back and run like the wind.

"i told u dwayne i am little king john, and u r mine now, so shutup u cow"

"ok w/e i just like to get kissed b4 i get fuqed or w/e leo dicario said in blood diamond." dwayne wanted to make the advances now. he wanted to show his new playmate that he knew how to get down and dirty like george bush senior. he peeled off little king john's purple shirt and threw it across the room onto the 400 inch plasma scren tv. little king john unbuckled his belt and took off his pants. dwayne then finished the cake by sliding off little king johns slippers. dwayne took a moment to relish what was about to go into his tight anus whole. it was a little overwhelming, but he knew he could tak the heat. like in fast and furious 24601. dwayne kissed little king john passionatly with all his might. but suddENLY! they were interuppted.

"who the fuq is that" dwayne questioned. he got up off of little king john and answered the door. there were 3 ppl standing outside the door. it was bruce willace, adam sandler, and the onceler. three of dwayne's biggest celebreity crushes.

"omg u guys i was just fuqing little king john here. would u like to join us? "

"hek yea, im jewish did i mention that?" adam sandler said.

"yes" bruce willace said, "we kno ur jewish."

the onceler felt uncomfertable. his only true love is jack frost. he didnt know if these guys were good enough for him. he went with it. the three guests peeled off their cloths and walked ovr to the sofa. little king john was lounging with his legs spread showing off his sweet charlie. adam sandler couldnt helo himself. he ran over to little king john and mounted himself ontop of him, inserting his honkadonk into little king johns badonkadonk.

"theres green light in my eyes," said gatsby from the window.

dwayne was surprised. why r there so many people wanting to get in on this sweet dwayne the rock johnson x little kign john action? he walked ovr to the window and let jay gaysby in.

gaysby instantly unbluckled his belt and inserted his willy into dwayne the rock johnson's butt. bruce looked at dwayne. the look of distress painted across dwaynes face was unbearable. "help me" dwayne said telepathically to bruce, "this mans yacht is stuck in my butthole."

"get ur boat out of my boyfren!" bruce screamed at gatsbie.

"no fuq u old sprout im not done yet," gunksbye sed as he continued to plant his seeds into dwayne.

the oneler pushed goutsby off of dwayne and put an axe to his throat.

"goatsby i had enough of ur bullying im going to kill you" the oneler screeched.

adam sandler looked up at the onceler, sweat pouring down from his temples. "oncie,, stop,, dont kill gotsby pls... thiats-" adam sandler was cut off as little king john pulled adam back into a deep kiss.

bruce willace stepped in to help.

"ooncerler, stop, u mest STOp, u dunno want ur doing." bruce begged.

"gobsy only cuases pain, he lives on an egg 4 chroits sake! i must sacrafice him to the lorax."

suddenly, a truffala tree grows out of the floor boards. the onceler cuts it down to make a stump out of the tree, he throws gaybye onto the stump

"say ur last words gutsby"

"so we beat on boats against the current borne back ceaselessly into the past." gotusby muttered.

bruce shed a tear.

onceler cut gotsbny in half.

dwanye reached out, "no!"

the lorax crawled out of gatsbys thorax, "helo friends i am here."

adam sandler stands up and walks out the door. "I am pregnate.. sad."

fin.


End file.
